The game: Patriots at Broncos The beer: Riverwalk Peppermint Mocha Porter The result: Win, 26–23 The method: NFL+ The record: 4–11 The headline: “Shit a brick! Drive me crazy! Outta my mind!” – Pussy Galore, “Brick” The commentary: The doink of all doinks—biblically loud to the point of absurdity, betraying either a microphone buried inside […]
It’s my job. Also, I can’t settle on which colors I like best for the blog, which is part of the goddamn creative process forever and ever. These beer-and-football “diary mission statement” playlists don’t write themselves, either. This Patriot season’s reads like bewilderment.
The game: Chiefs at Patriots The beer: Earth Eagle Puca Curry Pumpkin Porter The result: Loss, 27–17 The method: NFL+ The record: 3–11 The headline: “Yo, chief administrator, suck my oil.” – Dr. Octagon, “Technical Difficulties” The commentary: Has a team up ten points with minutes remaining in the fourth quarter ever advanced to the […]
The game: Patriots at Steelers The beer: Long Trail Hibernator Ale The result: Win, 21–18 The method: NFL+ The record: 3–10 The headline: “Has the world gone mad or is it me?” – Hawkwind, “Master of the Universe” The commentary: Hawkwind, as related throughout Hawkwind: Days of the Underground—Radical Escapism in the Age of Paranoia, […]
The game: Chargers at Patriots The beer: Berkshire Lager The result: Loss, 6–0 The method: NFL+ The record: 2–10 The headline: “Can we ever really know why, why the bad things come our way? Can we ever really know? Well, this is where we’re going, and this is where we’re heading. We’re hitting a new […]
The game: Patriots at Giants The beer: Smuttynose Really Old Brown Dog Ale The result: Loss, 10–7 The method: NFL+ The record: 2–9 The headline: “He doesn’t get paid overtime.” – Unwound, “The Light at the End of the Tunnel Is a Train” The commentary: Pats–Giants was on the unstreamable (to me) Fox, so I […]
Aside from the obvious answer of entitled/manipulated Trump supporters, fake Christians and self-described crackpot “free-thinkers” who do their own research—generally the same population of scum—my pet peeves are varieties of senselessness: 1. Rude behavior It is easy to be kind. To be rude takes effort, whether one goes full “Fuck your feelings!” or is purposefully […]
Faulty machinery: “What book are you reading right now?” The beer: Schilling Alexandr Czech-Style Pilsner The record: 2–8 The headline: “It’s not complete! I must compete!” – Jay Reatard, “Waiting for Something” The commentary: I’m a few days late with this former daily prompt but I needed a theme for the bye week. Remember that […]
The game: Colts “at” Patriots (in Frankfurt) The beer: Stoneface Slopeside Milk Stout The result: Loss, 10–6 The method: NFL+ The record: 2–8 The headline: “Hey you! You’re losing! You’re losing! You’re losing! You’re losing!” – Can, “Vitamin C” The commentary: He’s like the backup quarterback who comes in in the fourth quarter, so don’t […]
As a college sophomore I interned in the advertising department at the Boston Globe. Several times a week I signed a minivan out of the motor pool and drove downtown to pick up or drop off various publishing-related materials—page proofs, contact sheets, Baldini’s pizza, etc. More often, though, another intern and I took turns using […]
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