Beer and football XVI — week seventeen

The game: Patriots at Jets The beer: Hopothecary (The) Guard’s Gallipot Munich Dunkel Lager The result: Win, 42–10 The record: 13–3 The headline: “Up from the bottomless pit, this is it!” – Gravediggaz, “Pass the Shovel” The commentary: Good early morning! Did your president start any unsanctioned, unilateral wars today? I’ve had “Pass the Shovel” […]

Beer and football XVI — week thirteen

Quintessentially me: “Share five things you’re good at” The game: Giants at Patriots The beer: Definitive Contee Kölsch-Style Ale The result: Win, 33–15 The record: 11–2 The headline: “Gather the patriots like days of old! Have no regrets—soon the bodies are cold!” – Fifty Foot Hose, “Red the Sign Post” The commentary: I get the […]

Beer and football XVI — week twelve

The game: Patriots at Bengals The beer: Sacred Profane Smoked Dark Lager The result: Win, 26–20 The record: 10–2 The headline: “I’m gonna keep on doin’ what I’m doin’ till I can’t do what I’m doin’ no more.” – Isley Brothers, “Keep on Doin’” The commentary: You can only play the teams on your schedule […]

Beer and football XVI — week ten

The game: Patriots at Buccaneers The beer: Riverwalk Pumpkin Porter The result: Win, 28–23 The record: 8–2 The headline: “Oooh, it’s so good, it’s so good, it’s so good, it’s so good, it’s sooo goood.” – Donna Summer, “I Feel Love” The commentary: If Tony Romo is down to fuck then who am I to […]

Beer and football XVI — week eight

The game: Browns at Patriots The beer: Fat Orange Cat Pumpkin Spice Latte Oatmeal Stout The result: Win, 32–13 The record: 6–2 The headline: “I see your number, it’s a flashing sign.” – Ty Segall, “Who Are You” The commentary: New England football is back and so too is Idiot Patriots Fandom, the kind where […]

Beer and football XVI — week seven

The game: Patriots at Titans The beer: Liars Bench Pair of Pennies Czech Amber Lager The result: Win, 31–13 The record: 5–2 The headline: “Treason! Treason! The spectre looms again!” – Rainbow, “Kill the King” The commentary: “Kill the king,” you ask? I’m just riffing on my old Nashville Kings bit and celebrating G’s embrace […]

Beer and football XVI — week four

The game: Panthers at Patriots The beer: Von Trapp Schwarz Schwarzbier The result: Win, 42–13 The record: 2–2 The headline: “I’m gonna make them pay.” – Dead Meadow, “The Queen of All Returns” The commentary: On the subject of jobs, I think Marcus Jones’s as punt returner is pretty secure—put him in drag to make […]