Scene: it’s autumn. Route 1 along the North Shore (title case) of Massachusetts—rather, “Old Route 1,” to distinguish it from the stretch with strip clubs and furniture outlets and orange dinosaurs. The scenic portion with private schools and shuttered restaurants and blind intersections that almost kill you (truth). Radio: on. “Fire” by the Crazy World […]
Week seventeen The game: Dolphins at Patriots The beer: Great Rhythm Long Beach Lager The result: Win, 23–21 The method: Live via Paramount+ Week eighteen The game: Patriots at Bills The beer: Twisted Fate My Promises Are Lies Tonight India Pale Ale The result: Loss, 35–23 The method: Live via Paramount+ The headline: “All the […]
Week thirteen The game: Bills at Patriots The beer: Foley Brothers Long Beards Oatmeal Stout The result: Loss, 24–10 The method: NFL+ Week fourteen The game: Patriots at Cardinals The beer: Wormtown Blizzard of ’78 English-Style Brown Ale The result: Win, 27–13 The method: NFL+ Week fifteen The game: Patriots at Raiders The beer: Jack’s […]
The game: Jets at Patriots The beer: Ipswich Brown Square English-Style Brown Ale The result: Win, 10–3 The method: NFL+ The headline: “No one makes me close my eyes.” – Pink Floyd, “Echoes” The commentary: The less said about this one, the better. They should have! They should have made me close my eyes! Rhamondre […]
Week nine The game: Colts at Patriots The beer: Channel Marker Losing Daylight Dark Mild Ale The result: Win, 26–3 The method: Live via Paramount+ Week ten (bye) The beer: Hopothecary Bavarian Analgesic Märzen-Style Ale The headline: “Flush you like my toilet!” – ESG, “Erase You” The commentary: G. played me Ray Parker (Jr.)’s “Ghostbusters” […]
The game: Patriots at Jets The beer: Ommegang All Hallows Treat Imperial Chocolate Peanut Butter Stout The result: Win, 22–17 The method: Live via CBS The headline: “I like to act the part of being tough.” – Yo La Tengo, “Sugarcube” The commentary: Sometimes the universe just wants blog-makers to quote a particular goddamn song […]
The game: Bears at Patriots The beer: Mast Landing Gunner’s Daughter Milk Stout The result: Loss, 33–14 The method: Live via NBC The headline: “Just ’cause you feel it doesn’t mean it’s there.” – Radiohead, “There There” The commentary: You’d think Radiohead, of all bands, would have written a song called “If’n You Got Two […]
Week one The game: Patriots at Dolphins The beer: Turtle Swamp JP Porter The result: Loss, 20–7 The method: NFL Game Pass NFL+ The knockout: Steelers win, 23–20 Week two The game: Patriots at Steelers The beer: Moat Mountain Boneshaker Brown Ale The result: Win, 17–14 The method: NFL+ The knockout: Packers win, 27–10 Week […]
“We have a Switch??” Nothing gets past a nine-year-old (at the time) and thus last April’s school-vacation surprise was blown. That’s what I get for assuming consumer discretionaries can’t creep their way into kids’ awareness in the age of commercial-less streaming. That’s what I get for making no effort whatsoever to hide the distinctive red […]
I know nothing about football and I know nothing about politics. What I do know is self-editing and, later, resurrection. See? “My relationship with the Biff! Bang! words you’re reading [was] troubled, and if the Pats weren’t such a goddamn winning machine I might have signed off altogether following the Beefheart crowning achievement.” It sucks […]
More Cream Please 