The game: Jets at Patriots The beer: Boothbay Ken Brown Ale The result: Win, 27–14 The record: 9–2 The headline: “You’re like the ocean! Always in motion!” – Lyres, “Stormy” The commentary: It’s a funny thing to root for the Chiefs—especially so when the wished-for outcome might spell your doom two months early. Chiefs vs. […]
The game: Browns at Patriots The beer: Fat Orange Cat Pumpkin Spice Latte Oatmeal Stout The result: Win, 32–13 The record: 6–2 The headline: “I see your number, it’s a flashing sign.” – Ty Segall, “Who Are You” The commentary: New England football is back and so too is Idiot Patriots Fandom, the kind where […]
I get Evens: “How do you relax?” The beer: Goodfire Watt Pale Ale The headline: “Why would they fold up something so precious?” – Evens, “Cut From the Cloth” The commentary: Here’s another, since I continue to ask so many questions: what do followers of, say, twenty-five teams do to get pumped for a new […]
Il Guardiano: “Tell us the last thing you got excited about” The beer: Battery Steele Batella Mexican Lager The headline: “I try to fill it with gold, fill it to the top.” – Cat Power, “Great Expectations” The commentary: “Tell us.” Are we so familiar, WordPress community that doesn’t read my blog? I can’t say […]
Red pants: “If you started a sports team, what would the colors and mascot be?” The beer: Foundation Burnside Brown Ale The headline: “Well, a rose is a rose is a rose by any other name.” – Railroad Jerk, “One Step Forward” The commentary: Relocate those Foxborough fuckers, shed the heavy-baggage mascot and call them […]
The game: Bills at Patriots The beer: True West Hat & Mittens Dark Lager The result: Win, 23–16 The record: 4–13 The headline: “Something, something, something, when this is over.” – Shellac, “I Don’t Fear Hell” The commentary: “Fire Mayo” is activated a mere three hours after the bloggo tag’s inception—were “Fire Belichick” so effective! […]
The game: Patriots vs. Jaguars The beer: Riverwalk One-Eyed Jack Pumpkin Ale The result: Loss, 32–16 The record: 1–6 The headline: “Do you like the way it burns?” – Unwound, “Disappoint” The commentary: So many questions! So much Unwound! So much disappointment! The Future of What—released in April 1995 and recorded (according to the liner […]
Unfit for office: “What principles define how you live?” The game: Dolphins at Patriots The beer: Twisted Fate (The) Other Bubbles Dry Irish Stout The result: Loss, 15–10 The record: 1–4 The headline: “Son of a bitch!” – Van Halen, “One Foot Out the Door” The commentary: The reason for choosing the back half our […]
Replicating success: “Where do you see yourself in ten years?” The beer: Harpoon Celtic Red Ale The headline: “Can you picture what will be?” – Doors, “The End” The commentary: (Continued.) Captain Beefheart’s “Bills Corpse” is a missed opportunity, sure, but Trout Mask Replica and its collection of bush recordings get plenty of love in […]
The game: Jets at Patriots The beer: Great Marsh Classic Milk Stout The result: Loss, 17–3 The method: NFL+ The record: 4–13 The headline: “It couldn’t adapt so it couldn’t survive.” – Adverts, “Great British Mistake” The commentary: “Fire Belichick.” It’s been a WordPress tag since October 2021—that writer is pissed—and a sentiment for longer, […]
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