For my dear inter-net friends who celebrate Animal Crossing, graphic design and your New England Patriots, I give you two hours of effort, one island-ready pattern and countless screenshots to serve as an undo stack. (Also: zero consideration for creating the Pat Patriot logo of my youth. I’d still be going.) Fire up your Switch, […]
The beer: Riverwalk Stonehenge Session Lager The playoffs: 3–0 The headline: “There’s so many things to do!” – The Creation, “Life Is Just Beginning” The commentary: The Super Bowl is in two days so let’s stick to football, alright? No politics. (OK.) No music. (Um.) No Guardian copy-paste other than this wonderful headline and lede: […]
Forget about it, George: “What are your favorite sports to watch and play?” The game: Patriots at Broncos The beer: Geaghan Brothers Higgins Irish Red Ale The result: Win, 10–7 The playoffs: 3–0 The headline: “Ask those who have been before you what fate the future holds.” – Thin Lizzy, “Warriors” The commentary: I’m a […]
Jazzy, no! “If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?” The game: Texans at Patriots The beer: Bissell Brothers Revival Milk Stout The result: Win, 28–16 The playoffs: 2–0 The headline: “It’s all over and you’re gone.” – Claudine Longet, “Snow” The commentary: Jazzy! Down! I can’t see the score! […]
Readily visible or observable: “In what ways do you communicate online?” The game: Chargers at Patriots The beer: Foundation Lilith Dark Czech-Style Lager The result: Win, 16–3 The playoffs: 1–0 The headline: “Even the fabulous can’t avoid a random attack to pass a boring night.” – Helmet, “Murder” The commentary: I’m a blog-maker, alright?? I […]
Applicable lyrics: “What is your mission?” The game: Dolphins at Patriots The beer: Maineport Sugamamaness Brown Ale The result: Win, 38–10 The record: 14–3 The headline: “The tyrant needs attention to survive.” – Osees, “Glitter-Shot” The commentary: I’m old and predictable. New Osees album? Probably gonna be my favorite of the year, with few recent […]
The game: Patriots at Jets The beer: Hopothecary (The) Guard’s Gallipot Munich Dunkel Lager The result: Win, 42–10 The record: 13–3 The headline: “Up from the bottomless pit, this is it!” – Gravediggaz, “Pass the Shovel” The commentary: Good early morning! Did your president start any unsanctioned, unilateral wars today? I’ve had “Pass the Shovel” […]
The game: Patriots at Ravens The beer: Marshall Wharf Black Velvet Schwarzbier The result: Win, 28–24 The record: 12–3 The headline: “Nobody couldn’t do nothin’ once he let the brick go.” – Madvillain, “All Caps” The commentary: First, a public service announcement. Thee Mike Florio from Pro Football Self-Promotion is offering up his Big Shield […]
The game: Bills at Patriots The beer: Ipswich Red Dwarf Ale The result: Loss, 35–31 The record: 11–3 The Survivor: Savannah, 5–2–1 The headline: “Got mad and cried when you knew it was won.” – Tad, “Jinx” The commentary: That’s what happens when you go into the home stretch with a big advantage of then—ptooff!—you […]
Un-slack motherfucker: “Tell us one thing you hope people say about you” The beer: Camp Pennant Blackout Barrel-Aged Imperial Stout The record: 11–2 The headline: “It’s never been enough.” – Love Battery, “67” The commentary: People say? Reader(s) say(s)? Here it is: “That dude blogged every goddamn week of the season.” So far, so good […]
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