The beer: Earth Eagle Good Helmet Schwarzbier The headline: “This history lesson doesn’t make any sense.” – Built to Spill, “The Plan” The commentary: At Canobie Lake Park, a teenage boy with an alarming chest rash gathers among friends and wet towels. Nearby—too near, by accident—a man approaching fifty kills time on his phone while […]
The beer: SingleCut Frequency Lager The headline: “Don’t you know that I’ll always be true?” – Iron Butterfly, “In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida” The commentary: Three generations of Halfenhalfs returned to Patriots training camp after a year’s hiatus and it’s just as well we missed Matt Patricia’s failure to sit up straight and build a functional NFL offense. Good […]
Week seventeen The game: Dolphins at Patriots The beer: Great Rhythm Long Beach Lager The result: Win, 23–21 The method: Live via Paramount+ Week eighteen The game: Patriots at Bills The beer: Twisted Fate My Promises Are Lies Tonight India Pale Ale The result: Loss, 35–23 The method: Live via Paramount+ The headline: “All the […]
Week thirteen The game: Bills at Patriots The beer: Foley Brothers Long Beards Oatmeal Stout The result: Loss, 24–10 The method: NFL+ Week fourteen The game: Patriots at Cardinals The beer: Wormtown Blizzard of ’78 English-Style Brown Ale The result: Win, 27–13 The method: NFL+ Week fifteen The game: Patriots at Raiders The beer: Jack’s […]
The game: Patriots at Vikings The beer: Berkshire Turkey Trotter Brown Ale The result: Loss, 33–26 The method: NFL+ The headline: “Who could imagine that they would freak out in Minnesota? Who could imagine?” – Mothers of Invention, “Help, I’m a Rock” The commentary: I got no time to write this, baby. But Mike Reiss, […]
The game: Jets at Patriots The beer: Ipswich Brown Square English-Style Brown Ale The result: Win, 10–3 The method: NFL+ The headline: “No one makes me close my eyes.” – Pink Floyd, “Echoes” The commentary: The less said about this one, the better. They should have! They should have made me close my eyes! Rhamondre […]
Week nine The game: Colts at Patriots The beer: Channel Marker Losing Daylight Dark Mild Ale The result: Win, 26–3 The method: Live via Paramount+ Week ten (bye) The beer: Hopothecary Bavarian Analgesic Märzen-Style Ale The headline: “Flush you like my toilet!” – ESG, “Erase You” The commentary: G. played me Ray Parker (Jr.)’s “Ghostbusters” […]
The game: Patriots at Jets The beer: Ommegang All Hallows Treat Imperial Chocolate Peanut Butter Stout The result: Win, 22–17 The method: Live via CBS The headline: “I like to act the part of being tough.” – Yo La Tengo, “Sugarcube” The commentary: Sometimes the universe just wants blog-makers to quote a particular goddamn song […]
The game: Bears at Patriots The beer: Mast Landing Gunner’s Daughter Milk Stout The result: Loss, 33–14 The method: Live via NBC The headline: “Just ’cause you feel it doesn’t mean it’s there.” – Radiohead, “There There” The commentary: You’d think Radiohead, of all bands, would have written a song called “If’n You Got Two […]
Week one The game: Patriots at Dolphins The beer: Turtle Swamp JP Porter The result: Loss, 20–7 The method: NFL Game Pass NFL+ The knockout: Steelers win, 23–20 Week two The game: Patriots at Steelers The beer: Moat Mountain Boneshaker Brown Ale The result: Win, 17–14 The method: NFL+ The knockout: Packers win, 27–10 Week […]
More Cream Please 